Like Pieces of a Puzzle
Originally posted on March 11, 2007
(continued from Private Quarters, Private Talk)
Kohana: In love with……?....Oh no, Asher, of course I’m not.
Asher: But you were.
Kohana: I……don’t know. I might have thought I was….once.
Asher: And now?
Kohana: I…. maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all. I don’t know how to say what I want to say. Because if you were thinking that, I must be doing a very poor job of making myself understood.
Asher: I thought maybe it was part of why… you always hold back.
Kohana: No, I think that’s more because I feel so…out of my element with you sometimes. Because we’re so different.
Asher: I had hoped you were becoming more comfortable. I don’t know what else to do to help with that.
Kohana: It’s not you – you’ve been wonderful. I think I’m hesitant because…. you know how I like to think things through, make sense out of everything? When I do that, I can usually trust my conclusions. But my feelings…. don’t always make sense. They pop out at the oddest times and make me think irrationally, even behave irrationally. So it’s hard to trust what I’m feeling.
Asher: I can understand that. Emotions aren’t always predictable or controllable. They are what they are, and it helps if you can at least recognize them… talk about them.
Kohana: I’m sure you are quite good at that, Asher, but I don’t know if I ever will be. You’re open and expressive and your writing skill helps you find the right words to say. That’s just one of our differences.
Asher: Nothing wrong with having some differences.
Kohana: But are we ………..too different, do you think? To go any further in our….in this…
Asher: (teasing) You don’t even know what to call “this,” do you?
Kohana: No I don’t. I’m afraid I haven’t found an adequate name for it yet.
Asher: “Association?”
Kohana: That makes it sound like a business arrangement.
Asher: “Relationship.”
Kohana: That’s over-used and awfully inexact.
Asher: “Liaison?”
Kohana: That one always strikes me as a bit sordid.
Asher: “Affair?”
Kohana: Um..…no.
Asher: What about…. “romance?”
Kohana: Hmmmm, yes, I think that’s the one. I believe I can live with tha…
Kohana: You didn’t answer my question, Asher.
Asher: Mmmmm question, there was a question? Oh, yeah, about being too different?
Kohana: Yes…
Asher: Try to look at it this way. Have you ever put together a puzzle?
Kohana: Yes, but I.. what’s that got to do with anything?
Asher: Then you know with a puzzle, all the pieces are different.
Kohana: Yes I know that too, but what’s that got to do with us?
Asher: Those pieces are different, Kohana, so they can fit together. Stay together. Once each piece is connected to its counterparts, the bond is very strong. I think we’re like a puzzle, waiting to be put together. Some of the pieces already fit just fine. We need to find the way the rest fit together.
Kohana: Do you think we’ll ever finish this particular puzzle?
Asher: Oh yeah, I do. And that’s when we get to see the whole beautiful picture. Won’t that be cool?